I still think he knew it but…

as long as I search for justification
I won’t be justified

I always thought he knew it

but only now
just now
the thought rises

it’s my mind

slightly a new
purified version
but still imperfect


although the dazzled
has always held the probability that

there was obviously a thin line of a passage

that he may have never known

I ignored knowingly
the probability

the ignoring knowingly
belonged to that thin line of a passage

I cannot rely on word of temptation
to drink from a maybe-clean-well

and so
only now
I may justify to set it open
it is (literally) made of the same material
of the heart
set on universe
universe: as my working table
and observed

observed as one of these illusions
same as the others
but with a difference :
it receives my attention
so that with it
a new version of I
deserves an analysis

just to get to know

without attachment
without expectation
and with courage
and with a possibility
to shed some teardrops:)
yeah even that

it is possible
just to understand

and for nothing else

it is a technology of investigation
and my analysis reveals a truth
a truth of a possibility
where possibility is temporary –
knowing well
it is one of many other possible stories –
and its truth :
the only permanent one

such are Samskaras
wisdom knows we shall not waste time
to speculate where these come from

we are here and now as we are

only now
I consciously want to have a glance on this image
from the past

that he might
as much as I
never known
what truly was happening that time

while it was happening

not to make him right or wrong
just to understand
why I am analyzing this right now

we were both complaining
about physical heat
I read him back for the first time
and got confronted once again
after all this time

with his beautiful mind

but is that I?
or is that I that is supposed to be
to reread
according to the recipe

of the technology
described above
to understand
the truth of I

my heart knows the answer
and my table shall reveal
for what is left behind
is just a coffee stain


photo by Alin, Mumbai  Feb2016

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