ladybird*

sometimes you are with me when I bike
right in the middle of my eyes
you look through
as if recreating tides

sometimes you rise
stretch my tailbone
cross my neck all along
and silently whisper love and hate words

until you painfully adjust yourself towards an opening
hidden under a golden crown

you tie us by subtle secret  lines
as if a puppet-pendulum
anchored to a bluish-green star
somewhere far away
as far as a single jump-rope swing
which I may call home sometime

is that why you send me signs
while I listen
like that lady bird today …
perfectly matching to the colors of an eloquent orange brown pottery
by which geishas serve

a ceremonial rice bowl the labels tell
exhibited behind glass only
my silhouette
reflected in dim lights
becomes a dance of invisibility
hiding teardrops
along a museum corridor
covered with cherry blossoms

I ignore I say all the stupid signs
continue a play
with the luck bug
alight on my right side
observe its dotted natural beauty
forget all there is around me
oh yes she knows me

I farewell her over a giant photograph of a well respected lady
make it a living part of her brooch and dream away
if – maybe she’d be me
some lifetime ago
and you the lover
of our lingering sad story…

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Don’t you forget about me:

For once I have known what it means to be at now and be only now.
For once I appreciated a cobweb on my face at tree level as a sign of my life.
Something that used to be so scary converted to confirmations of existence just.
Oh the fright be a torchlight and yes I have made it indeed or died.


Is that maybe why I feel so high sometimes?
Cannot use my eyes?
Does eating coconut help for some gravity?
My body said to do so recently.

but so anyway I have good news :
that ongoing heartache is gone now 🙂
So wipe off your care about my worrisome insomnia.

And guess what!
Apparently I owe my new health to your new affair!
After I rang your ‘concept of friendship’ bell,
unattended highs dropped ties deep down a steep mountain valley.
Amended a past blasphemy to praise your love only.
It’s like a heart delivery after halved one’s compulsory adversity.

and there I left you under a pine tree
observing me as if nudity
Shine now you the one facing the sun at dawn
beyond that steep valley
where once we danced arm in arm
in laughter and joy and purity
but I slipped –
slipped down  left
towards a darkness lit by mourners’ prayers
was that really a dream?
or have you once again saved my life?

so listen, listen now peacefully to the song of the stream running beneath.
Make that water sound like my spirit
and let me go back to my exile land.

A cow said don’t worry he will be happy
Radio said don’t you forget about me
and I wept
a riverfall of farewell
but NO I cannot take you with me this time
but ditch you to purity
so call it home if you like and be me
as we have always been since eternity.

P.S. A Burp!

just a poem it was
A poem of love at most
in the form of

a flower,
a rainbow,
a bird ,
a tune,
a word ,
a picture

Some came in written
in technological terms
Some quantized
as futuristic incense

You have sensed it all
the untold
Even long before my say

Not ‘the all’ go though
through
You know … once you can close yourself,
set a fence…

but in that latter case
although you may have done your best
to shut these gates
It seems they have reached premises against
without my knowing
aethēr so lucid does trespass
once built an absolute bridge through souls of equivalent selves.

Each n every time is  mine a hopeless cry to make you furious ?
A touch at the physical and meta-physical to eventually develop anti-sense?

Naturally so easy
As you reside at an exact opposite side of me

Angered n equally frustrated
in rage of a momentous burst
You  sell my identity
<Intimately-shared-digital>
to a dreadfully operating net-entity
and target me as if to spears
oh how that really hurts
maybe you wished so
but no not really

a boomerang brings in a rhyme
of a thoughtless action
returns it to the center of a rotating spiral
where you stand
the exact opposite end

I won’t allow though
You to frown
this way you learned to simmer n cool down
became a clown of your own ghost town
as we’re entangled beings
already since sometime

so let me just also have fun
Instead of you- bring me down
On the competing wheel game of up n down
Oh no there we sit not anymore!

Realize to have targeted a wrong one
Once it is so much alike  an opposing side or a town or a crown
Of you and both eventually you!
So wonder in sane what did I do
And put a SPAM mask on
To warn me through
and clearly do as if you were one of them:
an Intellect-Deficient-Agent scam.

So let me just  P.S.  a burp here now
Haven’t learned to develop gallstones of anger to compete thyn
but joy at most with a parasympathetic smile
Take it as a blessing if you like or a teasing
that she has you loved so without your willing
and equally convert it to a bile.

Joker Hearts!

Video, edits, poetry, spoken, written, directed and performed by : Alin Duraduryan

Drums: Robbert van Nispen

Poem/Lyrics :

Joker Hearts

AiaiaiAI!
I broke the bads Damn!
beyond the saddened eyes of a Notorious Funkyman

As if me were you
just to catch an incognito glimpse of you

Oh how I wish that’d stayed a joke in town
haven’t shitted like a bird on my head n convert me to a punk
cannot turn’t back
such an irrelevant inconvenient run
was dark dark
dark brown
beyond the thickening curtains shattering gossipers
at hours before the break of dawn

I don’t do with tarot cards
my heart longing burning for your mirage
allows me not visualize

truth as is cruel
so I blow a puff
high tigh tight yotabye
n bluff you up
only how I wish was that a dream now but no man
t was no funky man
although with a funkyman
was so bad bad
and I! after

as bad as you can be in hearts
and still me is so good in dance
nobody could score us! …Once we have had fans.

Read you thru the minds if not hearts and broke it open now!
saw yours was not true talkin to me
although remains so lovingly
eyes with glittery in memory
as sad as it can be
if you not yourself convert it later on to … jokingly
I say … like you
keep this a secret itsmak for luck only
then I knew what you meant…
then I saw what you saw…when you looked at me

I looked at him not with fake eyes of you oh love me true
and said Goodbye.
ie rolls a colorful bead – its a gift
with a who knows what future brings
me nodding agreeably
for the phrase only
Nay its neither for you nor ie
future a farewell at most
to include you both
and me
and I promise me
never I break hearts by puffs again
will stick to tarot cards
keep tis a hard learned lesson past
where heart allows
if not minds.